Shadow World

Shadow World

I woke up this morning in a different place
My reflection showed a stranger face
Echoes of a world that I once was in
Broken remnants of all that’s been

This shadow world of darkened life
Strangles breath of what’s alive
Something’s wrong here, what is real?
Melting smiles and shattered wills

Everyone’s not who they claim to be
Their hugs send shivers all through me
I go along for I don’t want to be seen
All along plotting how to set myself free

Their words say one thing, their hearts another
Monsters hidden beneath their kind covers
And when they bite, their ugly heads rear
Their ferocious scream is all you can hear

The lines are blurred so easily in shadow
Misheard whisperings warped in its echoes
Resentment masked by cover of love
And nothing you do can be enough

So soon it is that you forget how to trust
So easily it all turns to dust
And you realise that you’re on your own
Your sins committed never condoned

The shadow world will swallow you
And there’ll be nothing you can do
So never fall here, never give in
Don’t go those places I have been

For here, the saviour is your sword
And you can never return to your life before
You keep it with you by your side
Always with you from day till night

You can never escape this shadow place
The answer lies in your stranger face
For it lives inside your very soul
Stays with you till your days are old

You can use your sword to cut it out
But you live life here so filled with doubt
Besides, what would remain but a gaping hole?
Burnt forever in your tainted soul

I wish I remembered how to smile
That I could escape the shadows for a while
But now I sleep with my sword by my side
And dream of the ocean changing its tide.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012

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Fugitive

Fugitive

The world took all of me today
And rained down all my tears
What’s left is hollow emptiness
Raw sting of restless fears

Something took my colours away
And I’m so very cold
I watch the rain paint black and white
Grey stains in place of gold

And I wonder if it’s all my fault
I ruined what never began
Searched wrongly for my happiness
For I thought I’d understand

Now happiness despises me
Disappeared and called me a fool
Left me with no will to fight
With nothing left to do

Now I stay in limbo
Imprisoned in this place
Wish for heaven, but I must stay
For they won’t let me escape

I wanted to feel okay again
But joy has evaded me
It hides in a place so dark and gone
A place I just can’t see

And I just keep on sinking
As I try to change my own mind
Telling myself hope hasn’t left
That people can still be kind

But I realise it was never happiness
That really ran away
I’m a fugitive of my own life
From tomorrow’s impending today

And I just keep on running
And whenever I am found
They must tie me down and lock me up
And keep me tightly bound

They demand happiness of me
But I tell them she escaped
Go find her then, but don’t they know
It’s already far too late

Drowning in the rain that made an ocean
I swim up toward the light
I wish to break the surface
And watch my soul take flight.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012

Other Girl Syndrome

I feel I should apologise for the lack of poetry lately. I’ve been in somewhat of a slump that I just can’t seem to get out of. Messed up does not even begin to describe what’s going on in my head. It doesn’t exactly get the creative juices flowing (well, maybe sometimes). Anyway, I don’t want to bore you with tales of my self-indulgent misery, so here’s another piece of poetry. It’s not solely about me, but I think most girls have gone through something like this at some point or another, unless you’re Miranda Kerr…har-dee-hah.

Other Girl Syndrome

Just one smile would be all right
A glance just here and there
For remaining but a sheet of glass
Brings nothing but despair

Must be the way she stands sometimes
The way she hides her eyes
She’s the ghost of everyone
And she wishes she knew why

All they need do is twirl their hair
Or, sometimes, nothing at all
And she watches time and time again
As their suitors start to fall

They share with her the numbers
How many they’ve caught in their net
And she remains but silent
For she hasn’t caught any yet

Yes, there must be something wrong
Not skinny, not pretty enough
No hair that falls right to her waist
She’s none of the above

It’s getting to be a tired game now
And she doesn’t even try
Fruitless attempts bring misery
And so does asking why

The best she can do is try to breathe
For they never promised a kinder world
And perhaps one day she’ll finally be
More than just the other girl.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012

Listen

Listen

She laid in bed till midnight came
Her pillow wet from teary stains
Once again they’ll never know
How deep she sinks till she’s so low

She tries to tell them what she feels
But they dismiss it as nothing real
Got more important things on their minds
They tell her she will be just fine

The joy she shares is always unheard
She tells the truth, they hear just words
Another time, another day
Since she was young, it’s been this way

Waiting till the clock struck nine
She gave up hoping for their time
Guilt silenced what’s left of her will
And it seems time’s always standing still

She hardly sees them anymore
They blame the world for all that’s torn
What’s whole for others is broken in them
There really was no other end

But it’ll be okay, it’s okay now
What was never there just can’t be found
She can never know if this is why
She’s always left one step behind

Now she’s afraid to even speak
To tell them ‘bout those things she seeks
Silly girl, what a silly girl
With grand delusions of the world

But what’s the point when they don’t hear
She keeps to herself those things she fears
This world always breaks her down
And she dares not make a sound

It’s midnight again and she’s alone
Always, forever, on her own
She closes her eyes and lies in bed
And thinks to herself those things unsaid.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012

Fireflies

Fireflies

I guess I’ll be waiting for you, darling
As I stand here on the edge
Counting fireflies in the air
Feet dangling over ledge

It all seems to be a little too late
Won’t you know that I’m so scared?
I’m afraid you’ll see right through me
My hollow soul so bare

You’ll ask me about the fireflies
And I’ll tell you about the light
You’ll wonder why I spent so long
Counting endlessly into the night

The way they glowed enraptured me
And for a while, I saw nothing else
My eyes were rosy pink impaired
Their glow was all I felt

You see, it’s so dark without them
Won’t you know I’m so terrified?
If you saw me just as I am now
Without those glowing lights

They gave me a mask to hide behind
A false hope I clung tight onto
I guess I damaged myself that way
Or I might already have you

So I stand here in the dark now
Still wondering if it’s too late
Feet so close to tumbling
Toward a different fate

But I’ll be waiting for you, darling
I’ll wait to see your light
I’ll stand here in the darkness
And hope for you, my firefly.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012

Something Else Sunset

Something Else Sunset

She sits where the mountaintop touches the sky
And watches the sunsets pass her by
Each day she’s gone a little more
And it seems it’s always as it was before

Whispers from stars it might be all right
But time gave up her will to fight
Now all that’s left is for her to wait
And maybe, just maybe, it won’t be too late

She stares down at the world below
Those little things she used to know
She hopes for wings when she must fly
She hopes for heaven when she must die

Just something else, some other place
Where tears don’t constantly stream down her face
She yearns to feel that rushing air
To fill the void that’s her despair

The sunset will be her solace for now
Until she’s sure what’s lost can’t be found
Then something else may await her there
Beyond the sunset – if she still cares.

© Lily K. Lynn 2012